This selection may be even more embarrassing than MMMBop, but it’s on the playlist and I made a commitment so here we go. My name is Tonya and I have an embarrassing Mariah Carey song on my running playlist.

If you’re just joining in, I’m sharing the deep message or the life lessons or the rule to live by that can be found in every ridiculous song on my running playlist. When I’m done, I’ll have my own manifesto. If you want an idea of where we’ve come from, check out a few of the previous installments.

But back to the song at hand. Maybe you should take a minute to watch the video.

I mean, doesn’t everyone have this fantasy? Don’t we all have someone, even if we never actually spoke to that person, that we believe missed their chance with us? Don’t we all secretly hope or wish that “someday, the one you gave away will be the only one you’re wishin’ for?”

So, yeah. We all have our awesome revenge fantasies and they can be pretty empowering. It’s why we watch things like My Fair Lady or The Duff. But despite how fun these fantasies might be, I don’t know that revenge is manifesto worthy. I tend to believe the old saying that holding grudges is the equivalent of drinking poison and hoping another person will die. The only person hurt by grudges and revenge is the person holding the grudge or plotting revenge.

So where does that leave us with Someday? It’s a peppy little tune but is it really manifesto worthy? On my latest run, I realized that the answer to that question is absolutely yes. There is a great message in this song. It’s just a matter of perspective:

What if this song was being sung to you by that person you were at your core but let go of to fit in, to be cool, because you thought you needed to be better than what you already were. Can you imagine that small essential voice inside of yourself saying, “Someday the one you gave away will be the only one you’re wishing for”?

It happens to all of us, usually around middle school. Someone says something or you just intuitively know that your Lego obsession or love of 1950’s musicals or whatever wonderful and unique quirks you possess would never pass muster with the cool kids. You realize you aren’t pretty enough, or funny enough or whatever enough and you set about to do whatever it takes to become better. Most of us have been doing it for so long now it’s not even conscious anymore. We are still doing things, dressing certain ways, and just being, all in an effort to fit in without really acknowledging who we really are and what we really crave.

But somewhere deep inside is a longing to be that person you were before you cared what “everyone else would think”. And I for one think it’s time we listen to that little voice deep inside that’s singing

“you were so blind to let me go. You had it all but did not know. No one you find will ever be closer to all your dreams than me.”

You had it all. But the good news is that you still do. Let’s all take a minute and think about that person deep within each of us who just is whoever she wants to be and isn’t worried about “what everyone else thinks.” Who is she? What does she love? What does she long to do? You still have it all and it’s right there inside of you. All it takes is getting quiet and listening to her again.